Andy Rooney
"I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?"
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Top Andy Rooney Quotes
"Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives."
"If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it."
"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."
"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
"People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."