Fun quotes

“If there is a supreme being, he's crazy.” Marlene Dietrich

“By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out.” Richard Dawkins

“Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.” Albert Schweitzer

“Success is a great deodorant.” Elizabeth Taylor

“Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid.” John Wayne

“Even if I did have, you know, a 'Sports Illustrated' body, I'd still wear elegant clothes.” Adele

“A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.” Yogi Berra

“If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” Yogi Berra

“After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say 'I want to see the manager.'” William Seward Burroughs

“Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” Ambrose Bierce

“Age is not important unless you're a cheese.” Helen Hayes

“If you rest, you rust.” Helen Hayes

“Positive anything is better than negative nothing.” Elbert Hubbard

“If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.” Andy Rooney

“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” Andy Rooney

“Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.” Andy Rooney

“Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.” Fran Lebowitz

“I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.” Fran Lebowitz

“The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.” Fran Lebowitz

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” Margaret Mead

“Always admit when you're wrong. You'll save thousands in therapy... and a few friendships too.” Harvey Fierstein

“Gossip is nature's telephone.” Sholem Aleichem

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.” Charles Schulz

“Life is one long process of getting tired.” Samuel Butler

“Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.” Joseph Addison

“Bad taste creates many more millionaires than good taste.” Charles Bukowski

“A woman uses her intelligence to find reasons to support her intuition.” Gilbert Keith Chesterton

“If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday.” Noel Coward

“Work is much more fun than fun.” Noel Coward

“My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.” Rodney Dangerfield